It is January, 2020—the start of a new year and a new decade. For many people, the second January rolls around, there is an automatic instinct to create and follow through with a New Year’s Resolution. To some they might want to take on a new hobby, take steps to be healthier, foster positive relationships, or much more. For others, they might not even know where to start; however the pressure to create that resolution remains. When you think about it, it makes sense. Why wouldn’t we want to set goals for ourselves to mark this new phase of time? When we reflect back on the year before, that reflection might include the goals we accomplished or maybe even the goals we set out to accomplish, but didn’t.

From a mental wellness standpoint, setting goals and incorporating ways to positively change can be hugely beneficial. In fact, that can be a lot of the work that occurs in counseling.

If you might be someone who is looking to make positive changes, but you are not sure where to start, here are some mental wellness focused tips that can help:

  • Ask yourself the miracle question. Solution Focused Therapy will implement this question in order to help clients think of possible outcomes or goals that they want out of their lives. Simply ask yourself this. What if you woke up tomorrow morning and the biggest miracle happened in your life to make it perfect? What would that look like? What might be different?
    • If the miracle metaphor doesn’t fit for you, then ask yourself: what would happen if you were to wave a magic wand and all would be how you wanted it?

Once you have that answer for yourself, you can have a better picture of what it is that you might want to shift. Whatever in that miracle is different than how life is currently could be something to work on.

  • What do you like about yourself? Setting goals doesn’t always need to be about drastic change. Try making a list, drawing, or even talking out a few traits that you like about yourself or a few behaviors that you like. Perhaps your goal can be doing more of that very thing.
  • Seek out some support. Seeing a professional counselor, a trusted religious official, a family member, or a friend can be hugely beneficial when seeking out new goals. After all, these may be the figures that interact with you the most. Remember that these people are there to support you and can be there to have these kinds of conversations.

Whatever your goals might be for 2020, we hope you have a wonderful one!

About the author

Becca Lantry is a registered Senior Associate Marriage and Family Therapist seeing clients via Telehealth for a local private practice. She holds an MA in Counseling and Education and an MS in Marriage and Family Therapy from San Diego State University. She works with young adults, adult individuals, couples and families around confidence, love, relationships, and empowerment. Becca currently has openings to see California residents via Telehealth. If you live in California and would like to work with Becca via Telehealth, visit her practice website here: https://bit.ly/492ZbNS, or you can email her at Beccalantrymft@gmail.com.
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